Acceptance: The Key to Long-Lasting Habits Building

Perfectionism can be a nasty habit. It tells you that if you can’t do something perfectly, you shouldn’t do it at all. It tells you that if you screw up once, you might as well just give up.

It’s toxic when trying to form new habits.

Let’s take an example. Does this sound familiar? You decide to start a new workout routine, and for the first few weeks, things are going really well. You’re getting out for a jog three times a week, or you’re doing yoga each morning, or you’re lifting weights on a good schedule. Then, something goes wrong, and you miss a day. It’s harder to start the next day, isn’t it? And then something else happens, and you miss another day. Before you know it, you’re missing more days than you’re exercising, and then your perfectionism tells you that you should just give up.

But that’s not true. Just because you’ve hit a rough patch doesn’t mean you should quit building habits altogether, and your brain is just feeding you self-defeating nonsense.

That’s why we’re big believers in acceptance as a habit-forming tool.

Think about how the situation we described above would be completely different if, instead of expecting perfect adherence to a strict program, you acknowledged ahead of time that you’d have off days and that it’s okay if you missed a workout here or there. What would that do for your mindset?

See, perfectionism just gets in the way of getting things done. We liked this reminder from a helpful piece over at Fast Company:

It’s important to recognize that being so obsessed with making one thing perfect only makes you worse than imperfect in so many other areas. For instance, perfectionists often just won’t do things or get things done really late, so overall they become less successful than if they had chosen to lower their standards in the first place.

Remember, too, that the mental energy devoted to perfectionism can drain you and make it harder to focus on the other things that matter. Instead, try admitting and accepting that you are not perfect--that in fact, nobody is or can be perfect--and that you are not required to be perfect to still grow and become better. 

It’s like the old saying goes: don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good.

Have you discovered that accepting your flaws helps you grow and do more? Has perfectionism stopped you from building better habits? How did you get there? Share your journey with us in the comments.

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