Do You Have Habits, Routines, or Rituals?
If you look at how much we write here at Myrth, you might notice something about us: we really believe in the power of words.
We don't just believe in the power of lots of words though but in the power of choosing the right words. That's why, when we realized we were going to be talking a lot about things that we do regularly or repeatedly, we spent a good chunk of time thinking about what word we wanted to use to describe that behavior.
We realized that people tend to use three words to describe the things that they do repeatedly. The first is “routine.” The second is “ritual.” The third is “habit.” In the end, we chose “habit,” and we thought it would be helpful to talk about why we made that choice.
First, let's talk about the words we didn't choose. “Routine” is probably the most commonly used word. It means doing something over and over and over again. Dictionary.com describes it as “commonplace tasks, chores, or duties as must be done regularly or at specified intervals; typical or everyday activity.”
To us, “routine” had a bit of a negative connotation. It feels drab, uninspired, even a bit dreary. We wanted something that didn't bring people down when they thought about it, because making lasting change can be hard enough without psyching yourself out about it every morning.
The second word people use is “ritual.” We liked “ritual” because it implies an element of specialness, but we were concerned that it elevated daily activities too much. Merriam-Webster backs us up on that: “ritual” primarily refers to rites and religious customs. When something takes on the air of the sacred, not doing it can feel like a personal failure. It can make us feel like we are much more at fault for screwing up than we actually are.
Think about how you feel when you break an important promise to someone you love deeply. We didn't want you feeling that way every time there was a little slip up in your plans for developing new daily activities, especially since lasting change is hard and people often slip up along the way. As nice as it sounds, “ritual” was out.
We wound up liking “habits” because it's a fairly neutral term. There are good habits, and there are bad habits. There are intentional habits, and there are unintentional habits. There are complicated habits, and there are easy habits. We liked that the word “habit” encompasses a range of activities that members of our community might want to develop over the course of time.
So “habits” it is, and we found that over the last several months of building Myrth, we've grown quite attached to the word here. Habit helps us feel accountable, but it doesn't make us feel overly stressed out.
And that's the goal, really. We want this community to be a source of accountability and positive growth, but not stress or negative self-talk or that looming, creeping sense of dread you feel when you have an obligation that you don't want to or can’t fulfill.
How do you talk about the things you do every day? Have we changed your mind? Leave us a note below and let us know.
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