Accountability Buddies For All Occasions: Rec. Reading v28

We recognize that habit-building and good mental health can’t be isolated to just one corner of the internet. Myrth is our favorite tool, but it’s not our only tool. In our regular Recommended Reading series, we’ll share links to articles, books, and other tools that we think you’ll find helpful in your journey.

Accountability is at the core of what we do here at Myrth. It’s one of the pillars of our approach to habit-building and lasting change in our lives. Having a partner to help keep us accountable means we’re able to receive and give support and encouragement. It also means we can help each other develop strategies and prepare for potential roadblocks.

Accountability buddies usually come up when people talk about getting into an exercise routine, but having a buddy along for the journey is helpful in any major life change or project. Here are some recent articles about working with accountability partners that we thought were particularly interesting and helpful.

1. Accountability Buddies While Job Searching

The hunt for a new job can be hard on the self-esteem, especially when the economy isn’t exactly hopping. It means a lot of rejections and sending out a lot of applications without hearing back at all. That’s when an accountability buddy can really be helpful:

Conducting a job search can be a very solitary pursuit. There's no one looking over your shoulder telling you what to do or how many jobs to apply for that day. Left to your own devices, you may get sidetracked by your favorite social media sites or Netflix shows. One way to remain accountable is to find an accountability partner. This person could be a friend, family member, coach or mentor. Develop a spreadsheet of the positions you’ve applied for with follow-up dates. Create a list of realistic short and long-term goals and work toward them every day. For example, decide how many applications you'd like to send out this week, or this month. By documenting your activities, it will help you stay engaged and organized.

In other words, an accountability partner can help you develop a strategy and keep you going when you might be tempted to push things off. That’s useful in all sorts of environments.

2. Accountability Buddies for Improving Reading Habits

We loved this piece from Hello Giggles, where the author talks about how adult life has gotten in the way of her previously strong reading habits (a common problem!) and her efforts to get back to reading good books for fun. 

If you're trying to make a better commitment to reading, [therapist Bijal] Shah recommends bringing in a friend to act as your "accountability partner." Shah says she does this herself, with different reading partners for different genres. "I think that's what makes me kind of get through the book and finish it, whereas otherwise, if I was just reading on my own, I'd just be like, 'Yeah I'll do that later,'" she says. With a reading partner, you can check in throughout the process of reading the book, simply asking your friend over text or phone calls what they thought of certain chapters. "Having that conversation and having that sort of reading incorporated into a relationship just keeps you going," Shah says.

This piece hits on one of the key things about an accountability partner: when you have somebody who’s working on something similar, and with whom you can share observations about the process and talk about strategy, you’re more likely to keep going.

3. Choose an Accountability Buddy Who’s Right for the Job

Having an accountability buddy is different from having a friend who is working on something similar or a friend who offers you encouragement. The Good Men Project explains:

An accountability partner is someone who has a growth mindset, gone through a transformation journey similar to yours or is currently going through one. They can empathize and understand your struggles and is willing to do anything to help you out and see you succeed. It includes holding you accountable for your actions and keeping it real. To find someone with these characteristics, you need to show vulnerability, ask for help in the right forums and groups, attend events where there are more chances you would meet like-minded people going through the same struggles, and do a lot of research.

We loved that this piece emphasized the need for vulnerability in both finding and being an accountability partner. Making major changes in your life or undertaking a large project can be scary, and it helps to have an accountability partner who understands that.

4. Quitting Plastic? Get an Accountability Buddy to Help!

We loved this piece from the Adirondack Almanac, which covered the journey of several people as they worked to give up using various plastics this summer. Aside from offering lots of great tips for substituting items, they also hit on one of our favorite topics: accountability buddies. Participants found that teaming up with a friend or family member made it easier to cut down on plastic and to stick to it long-term. 

Whether you’re working to build a new company, trying to build up to a large number of sit-ups every day, quitting smoking, or learning a new skill, having an accountability buddy can be a key part of that process. Be open and vulnerable, enlist the help of somebody with similar experience, and rock on!

Have you worked with an accountability buddy? What did you learn from the process? We’d love to hear more from you in the comments.

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